Jefferson City’s Signature Disease

Mike Parson

On a pleasant evening between the Holidays, many from the 1975 class of Duchesne High School gathered at a nice bar and restaurant.

As usual, as appetizers disappeared from the middle of the table (actually, tables pushed together), we ordered more artichoke dip, toasted ravioli, calamari and such…or, we tried to order more.

Alas, our waitress suffered from a severe case of CADD – Customer Attention Deficient Disorder.  For example, it took 25 minutes in the not-crowded joint for me to get my double Irish whiskey on the rocks.  The ravioli I ordered came out with a second order, a serving requested better than a half hour before mine from the other end of the table.  A few of us gave up on ordering a second drink.

Now, a long table of 60-somethings, without spouses, drinking and eating for hours tends to bring out the best in a waitress.  None of us was nursing a single $10 bill for the evening.  So, when the waitress didn’t care about us, well, it must be CADD.

At noon today the Missouri House of Representatives began its 2019 session.  In his opening remarks, new Speaker of The House Elijah Haahr (R – Springfield) promised he’d allow no new tax increases and crowed about last session’s tax cuts.  A major item on this year’s agenda of accidental Governor Mike Parson, as well as Haahr:  replacing major parts of the CLEAN constitutional amendment with a new, more Republican friendly version.

You see, on the bluffs overlooking the Missouri River in Jefferson City a strange (though, ironically not fatal) disease strikes Republicans:  Voter Attention Deficient Disorder, or, VADD. 

In November a strong majority of Missouri voters endorsed Amendment 1.  That’s not a sign of voter intent, no, to elected Republicans it’s proof that the issue was too complicated for voters to understand.  Just as the legislature knew best on puppy mill regulation and concealed gun carry, the elects now plan to offer a ‘better’ CLEAN.

Oh, the elects did notice the overwhelming rejection of Right To Work from last August’s election.  That’s not stopping them.

Rep. Jered Taylor’s (R – Nixa) House Bill 259, The Freedom To Work Act, calls for county-level elections on a nasty version of Right To Work.   From the official summary…

The issues of adopting and repealing the act may be put on the ballot by the county governing body or by voter petition.If 50% of the counties, plus one additional county, adopt the provisions of this bill, the provisions will become effective in every county of this state.

A quick reminder:  Missouri has 114 counties and St. Louis City, so, half and one means 59 counties (57 + St. Louis City + 1).  Just 2,053 people live in Worth County and climbing by population the 59th county could be Benton County with 18,918 people.  In all, the least populous half of counties, together, include less than 640,000 people. 

Last November just 923 Worth countians voted.  Assume similar portions of the other little counties, and, well, Right To Work could become state law with way fewer than 300,000 votes!  To stop that from happening pro-worker groups would have to organize and operate in most all of the 114 counties – and the city – simultaneously.

The accidental governor favors this approach. Why not, the idea comes from “model legislation” available from the Koch Brothers’ friends at the American Legislative Exchange Council.  [For hundreds of references to ALEC’s mean spirited approach to government, just Google them.]

After all, those suffering from VADD see nothing wrong in overturning the will of the vast majority of voters.  If you can’t ignore the will of the many, look to sway the votes of the few.

Meanwhile, at my class’ gathering some of us did manage to get more alcohol:  Paul, on of my classmates, travels with pockets full of airline bottles of vodka.  He shared.  More on that later.

Glenn